FRU RASMUSSEN

Fru Rasmussen, the joint owner of the local inn, where I attended my wife's aunt's golden wedding (6/3/10), has died recently, aged 89. Her husband, aged 90, continues to run the business.

I don't know her first name. Her husband, in keeping with local tradition, is called "Inn-man" (see Rural Names, 26/4/10). She was always simply called Fru ("Madame") Rasmussen.

Fru Rasmussen is the only person I have ever addressed in Danish by the formal you-form "De". Like "Sie" in German, it is the third-person plural form of the verb (i.e. they), but with a capital letter. However, in contrast to German, where Sie is still very widely used, particularly in the work-place, the De form in Danish pretty much died out during the 1970's. My wife still uses it, often with people on the phone whom she doesn't know. But she's quite unusual.

Both my sons, notably the elder one, have worked at the inn, and they both always addressed Fru Rasmussen as De. When I asked them why, they said "you just do". Sure enough, after dinner at the golden wedding, I went into the kitchen and found myself automatically doing the same thing. I introduced myself and thanked her for having given them both jobs when they were boys. She was charming and self-deprecating, and said that they had not been a problem, since they obviously came from a very good family. Coming from Fru Rasmussen, it was one of the nicest compliments I have ever had.

Walter Blotscher